Double Digits for Lilly Scott Allen

 Lilly Scott,

You are 10. How has this happened. Double digits. Sensitive. Growing. Changing. Kind. Loving. Eager to please. Accepting. You're a special girl, and I know exactly how lucky we are to call you ours. All the incredible traits you possess, and I see each of them in you daily.

This year we forfeited a traditional birthday party and went on a trip. You and me. It was fantastic.

I picked you up from school, and we came home to finish packing. We drove to Atlanta for the weekend of you and me. We both needed the getaway and quality time together.

We went to dinner and ate multiple desserts, ice skating, dolphin shows, jewelry shopping, American Girl shopping, giggles, movies, room service, and so much more! This was one of my favorite trips, and I loved having this special memory with you :) 

Georgia Aquarium

Ice skating in Centennial Olympic Park, Atlanta

American Girl store

On your actual birthday I surprised you with cookie cake and siblings ;) and Paw Paw. 

(They misspelled your name, but it was too late to change it when I picked it up 😳)

Another great year in the books, my growing girl. I love you forever. 

-Mom

Wells Is TWO!

Man, oh man. Little (big) man is TWO. Let's not talk about how long he's been two. I've mentally prepared this post since Wells was 18 months old, but it's just now coming to fruition because I've let go of having all the pictures I wanted to post in order. They'll come. More importantly, let's celebrate Wells' first two years and share what he's like at this age.

Wells,

You may have just turned 2, but you're more like a triplet to Mac and Paisley. Where they go and what they do, you're right there with them. There are no obstacles for your mind and heart are set on whatever your eyes see. We've been told you literally bounce off walls to get from one thing to another. You're care free and so spirited. The things you do are quite hilarious, and you know it.

Counting is something you've gotten really good at, and you can get all the way to thirteen. Then we start back with your favorite trio: 8, 9, 10… The other day you brought had something in each hand. You held up the one in your left and said 'geen' and held up the right hand and said 'yeyyow'. Yes! You know your colors?! These older siblings are making me shine, kiddo! Thanks, M and P! Because let's be honest, I don't practice counting or colors. I'll encourage if you start, but I don't initiate it. Good thing siblings pick up where I slack, right?

We've gotten used to the missing front tooth, and just like they said at the dentist office, it's become who you are. The missing tooth actually fits your personality perfectly. Fun, daring, and cute as a button.

On your second birthday you weighed about the same as Paisley on her fourth birthday. You're in a solid 2T and quickly into 3T. (You're officially in a 3T now that I'm writing this.) You've surpassed the size Mac was in at this point in the season so dressing you for church has been interesting. I can stretch every day wear, but when we put you in those precious longalls with peter pan collar shirts, my heart skips a beat, and they barely fit. Shoe wise you've quickly gone into a size 8, which is only 1 size behind Paisley. People say you're a linebacker. Too bad (for you) you're also my baby and losing the one tooth was hard enough. I won't be signing you up for contact sports.

 This year we did your first hair cut. We basically took away the baby mullet. Dad had had enough of it.

You run and play so hard. When you're out, you're out for real. I will always cherish your chunky baby legs and round face. My baby you'll always be.

 The front door of our (old) house in October. 

We love and adore you, little Wellsy. You make us laugh and enjoy the little things. Your love for Mickey is unwavering, and we will snuggle you and watch 'Kiki' for as long as you'll let us. As for family names, you say 'Ma', 'Titi', and 'Coccy' for each sibling. Cutie pie, we think you're pretty special.

-Mommy and Daddy

M + P are FOUR!

Little bits, you keep growing. Every.single.day. You're taller, smarter, funnier, and more independent. This turning 4 is surreal to me. This year you've started your second to last year of preschool. Time refuses to slow down, and I continue to pray that I can savor every minute of goodness in our time before your entire day is spent with a school teacher. Since quality time is my love language, this is important to me. It is so incredibly important that we can share special memories of joy, laughter, and lesson learning as your independence in the world grows.

This year we had a Pirates and Mermaid party. Boys decorated treasure chests, and the girls decorated tiaras. We had a dress up corner for photo props, and a pirate ring toss with a chest of treasures.

I know the days of sharing a birthday are limited, but perhaps they'll last longer than most. You two are the best of friends, and your love and consideration of one another makes my heart beam with joy and pride.

Mac,

You asked for 'a monster truck with a remote control like at Mimi and Geep's house' to everyone who showed curiosity. I was fearful of 28 monster trucks, I'll be honest. We're learning about money management (give, save, spend) as well as super heroes. That gave more options for your birthday.

On the big day we went to the jump park. You love playing dodgeball with the 'blueberries'.

We met Dad and Mr. Matt for lunch, and you got sprite and dessert. Only on your birthday. ;-)

This isn't a birthday picture, but we went to the dentist the week you turned 4. Your second visit to see Dr. Jason, and you did great!

M, you really don't have a preference with material things. You love what others love. You celebrate others. Your heart is kind, so very kind. You say the sweetest, most sincere prayers. You thank Jesus for everything and everyone on a daily basis. I can't begin to explain the swelling in my chest when I hear your words to the Creator. It reminds me of what He must feel when we praise Him. Thank you for showing me this glimpse of pure joy and pride.

Blue is your favorite color. Every night you love to play Hulk smash with Dad. Your favorite food is yogurt, chicken, McAlister's baked potato, rice, Chick Fil A polynesian sauce, and anything sweet. You are obedient and a pleaser. You also whine, which is not my favorite, but whiny wash helps. TV and blowing bubbles are favorites to pass time. You're also a champ at Temple Run, which you call 'Scary'. The high score I can remember is 99,300. I can't get beyond 1000, and I'm pretty sure that's a pity points collection. Your favorite song is Jesus Loves the Little Children, and it is requested every night during bedtime snuggles.

This was your first all boys trip with Dad, Uncle Kyle, Paxton, and Blake. You got to ride on a plane, subway, and Uber cab. You went to Chicago for a Cubs game at Wrigley. Daddy set the bar pretty high ;-)

Putting into words how we feel about you is impossible. I can't begin to do that for any of my kids, but I hope that you always know we love you unconditionally, pray for your hearts daily, and open ourselves as a safe place for you always.

-Mom and Dad

Paisley Grace,

Darling. You are the life of so many environments. Rarely do you have a still moment. You're the mother of all those younger than you, and others older love to mother you. This doesn't seem to be an issue because you adore older girls. Thankfully you have a big sister who loves time with you more often than not.

When finally still and buckled down, this is what happens:

You make us laugh. Your smile is infectious, and you are so fun. And daring. So daring, my sweet, stubborn mini. There is no denying you're my little miss: matters are taken into your own hands, a strong front doesn't mean the inside isn't shaken, and you're a care taker. Here's proof of the 'do it yourself' little that you are. I didn't have the heart to 'fix' you for a bit.

During your birthday week we went to the dentist. You did great! 

The letter P is your favorite to write, and we celebrate each small victory as you prefer us to do. Attention is a motivator for correction and an encourager for being obedient. You enjoy picking out your clothes and declining mostly what I choose. So it has begun.

The healthy eater award goes to you: salad, cucumber, carrots, chicken, pickles, apples. You LOVE cheese in any form and ask for it constantly. Thankfully you enjoy salad to counter all that cheese. Climbing is also a favorite to pass time. We need a rock wall.

The newest loves of your life are your Bitty Baby twins, Caitlin and David. Next in line is your bicycle. You are so active, and I love it... mostly. Hey, it's who you are, and that is a precious thing.

We love you, P, and we love watching your growth and compassion for others. Thank you for being such a lively spirit in our home, and thank you for adoring something about every person you meet. You see value in every little thing, and that is such an amazing example of how Jesus loves His children {which is also a favorite song}. Before I close, I want to share your first favorite song at bedtime, which is He's Got the Whole World In His Hands. Then we take turns putting people in the song like 'Nana and Paw Paw' 'Mimi and Geep' 'Uncle Jeff and Aunt Amy' and Nash is always thrown somewhere in there.

My darling Paisley, you are joy-filled and a daughter of the King. Never forget the traits given to you, and continue to use them for His glory.

-Mom and Dad

Here are pictures of the big FOUR year old check up where Mac was stellar at the vision chart, and Paisley kept saying she could state what letter it was if she could get closer. :o) Which ended in Paisley labeled '20/30'. Haha.

 We love Dr. Jeanie!

Wells is 18 Months

Sweet, growing, cotton-blonde haired boy, you are halfway to 3, and less than 6 months to being a two year old. Every day you look more like both Mac and Paisley, and it's crazy the characteristics I'm learning that are inherited. Facial expressions, gestures, etc. Your vocabulary is growing like crazy, and you sing constantly. You love to sing 'ei ei o' from Old McDonald and the 'ohhhhh' from Needtobreathe's 'The Outsiders' song, which is also one of Mac's favorite. You're always up for a good karaoke session.

As every mom says, these days are flying by, but you still seem so little. I can handle that, I really don't mind keeping you little for as long as possible.

The missing tooth has become part of who you are, and I had no idea that incident would precede your carefree and wobbly nature. You are so stinking cute, and we absolutely adore you.

The recent thing you've mastered is holding up your hand to say 'me' when I ask a question. The first time we heard you do this was when we were a few days from leaving for Uncle Jeff's beach wedding, and I asked who was ready. Then I had to take a video, obviously. Because I'm the mama-razzi. 

And here is your photo album for this post :o)

You love dried strawberries. Not the fresh kind. Only the freeze-dried kind.

 When my hair is in dire need, Ms. Amy lets us come after hours to spare the others ;-)

 Your belly always does this because you eat SO much.

 Second beach trip, first time you played, next time you may remember that trip.

 Dollywood!

 I love to find these sweet selfie surprises on my phone. Smile.

 You LOVE to be outside, even in Sunday's best.

 Love, love, love you, sweet and crazy Wells.

-mom

The Kiddos Today

On the heels of Mac and Paisley's 1/2 birthday (Feb 19) and Wells' 15 month mark (also Feb 19), I wanted to write a brief description about each of the kids' lives and personalities. So here it goes...

To my precious offspring...


Lilly Scott,

You've discovered you actually like to walk. We went on our first hike one beautiful day in January, and you begged for more. We were enthused at your excitement, and we've been back to finish the trails every opportunity we have when the weather is nice.
Your favorite books are Ivy and Bean, and you're on the very last in the series. The shows you enjoy watching are Full House and Sabrina (the early years) and most recently, The Brady Bunch and The Cosby Show. We love those old shows. Also in entertainment, your favorite artists are Taylor Swift and Francesca Battistelli. Singing, dancing, puzzles, dolls/barbies, and listening to music are your favorites to pass time.
You are 4'3" and 67 lbs. You wear a size 8/10 and prefer comfort or ease. You've gotten really good at picking out your clothes, and I secretly still love that you ask for my thoughts or opinion. I know those days are numbered.
You have excellent behavior in school, and you are super helpful and loving at home. As long as you get some alone, quiet time, your spirit is kind and affectionate. You cherish (much like me) the quiet that comes during the day.
The dreams in your world are so sweet and conquering. Daily you come up with a way to help those that are less fortunate or don't know Jesus. I hope those passions lead you to work and do mighty things for His kingdom.

Mac,

Still a gentle soul, you're finding your crazy boyhood. You love dinosaurs, dragons, tv, sugar, and goldfish. Still no cheese, ever.
You adore daddy and friends and anyone who you ask, "You want to come to my house?"
You sleep with your brown monkey, George, and the zebra. You sleep all over the place so often you'll call out for someone to help you find George.
There's a mix of your favorite books: The Gruffalo, Chicka Chicka Boom Boom, the Sports Illustrated kids books. After we read at night, you ask me to sing. You request either You'll Be In My Heart by Phil Collins or Life Is a Highway from Cars.
You wear a size 4 to 5 shirt, and size 4 bottoms. You have a long torso like your dad.
There couldn't be a more detailed version of you. Maybe Paisley. You both watch, think, and question how Dad and I do things.
You're animated with your imagination of characters, and you love love love animals. Acting like them, anyway. There's still a fear of dogs from a few aggressive interactions, but I'm okay with that. I would rather you be cautious and safe.
Tee ball will be your first extra curricular activity, and you're so excited. Just yesterday at school you said, "I'm going to play tee ball, and my daddy is the coach!"
You're a great, brilliant, and sensitive little boy. I love to cuddle and sing to you, and I love it even more that you still let me. Thank you.

Paisley,

Let it be known that you adore Scotty. Wells too. Scotty is your upline, and Wells feeds your nurturing side. You also love clothes and anything shiny is 'so cute' to you. Even when I get dressed in anything other than workout wear, you notice. Trying on my shoes is your favorite before bath. This draws attention toward you, and that's where you shine. The little button nose of yours wrinkles, your shoulders rise, and your head tilts. Cutest.thing.ever.
You have NO FEAR and instigate most of the crazy in our house. You go from playing dolls with Scotty to throwing the ball with dad to tackling Mac.
There is a lot that you offer, and I love that you're interested in a wide variety of things.
Last year we tried dance for a few months, but it wasn't enough structure for you. The other girls were at least a year older, and it was difficult for you to focus. So to be honest, you were brought to me the last few classes because you wouldn't listen. I know you're a good listener because you're a pleaser, but I won't make excuses. You do need structure, and maybe next year we can try again.
When you're being restructured (aka 'talked to in a stern voice'), there's no eye contact. You refuse. If we are trying to get a picture, you cover your face for some reason. I don't know why, but I do know everything goes to your mouth. Gross. Dirty fingers, the rail at any public facility, you name it. I'm a bit of a germophobe so this totally disgusts me. People say you're building immunity, but if they had any idea how often you puke, there would be no words.
Much like me, if you want something, well, you'll get it. Forget waiting on others. This is where you teach me about myself. It isn't always a good lesson I'm learning either. In fact, I learn more often than not how I need to change.
You're a cuddler when you want to be, and recently you ask me to lay in bed with you at night. Sure thing, sweet girl. I'll snuggle you! You're the biggest snuggler thus far. You would sleep under me every.single.night if you could. Actually, you love when the puking starts because it means you have a place in mommy and daddy's bed. You eat that up.
You don't miss a beat, and I know you'll tell me every detail that I may miss from church, school, playtime, etc. I always know who is sick, absent, sad, happy, crying, etc. You love tellign me when your brother didn't listen at school. I secretly appreciate all the detail because I'm a detailed person.
We love you to pieces, little P. You're a bright star, and we enjoy this ride with you.

Wells,

You're growing so fast. You're a fast walker now, and there's more walking than crawling now. You say mama, dada, nana, and a few others I can't recall right now. There's a definitely love for Mickey when you get a chance to watch, but much like the fourth child, the older siblings have control of the remote. You honestly don't seem to care, you're just smitten to be among them.
Eating is your hobby, and the output continues to amaze me. You eat more than any two of your siblings combined.
Cheese has been a huge favorite, but we've cut out dairy. Last week you had a lot of cheese and yogurt, and your eczema was the worst yet. I'm not sure if it was uncomfortable, but it looked awful. It was all over your chest and back. Red and raised and scaly looking. I cut out dairy once I realized it was probably the instigator, and the eczema is going away. This really stinks because you scream for yogurt and cheese when you see it. Thankfully I can distract you with a banana or larabar.
You're a rough little chunk, and you love to be in on the night time wrestling matches.
Come bedtime (7:30), we brush your teeth and head to bed. Once the thumb goes in your mouth and your ear is grabbed, you're almost out for the night. Like P, you suck the thumb. Like M, you rub your ear. Ironic. Or genetic, I'm not sure.
As much as you like being part of the action, you're also pretty easy. As long as I carry you instead of seating you in the grocery cart, we can get a good Publix run. My arms may shake at the end, but you've been held and downed at least 2 food pouches we opened in store. Cashiers always chuckle at the empty pouches on the conveyor belt.
You're in 18-24 month clothes, and I can't keep up with your growth! Mac's seasons are a bit off from yours. The result is lots of layers as we try to figure out crazy weather trends. Except shoes. You hate them. Grandmas at Publix get a rise out of you not wearing shoes. I mean I put slippers on you, but they come off and are in my purse. Priorities, people. We need groceries.
You're the perfect piece to our puzzle, and we all adore you, Wellsy.

I Can Breathe

This year seems anew to me. Pretty obvious as it is a new year. But this time it is different. I will turn another decade, my faith is a continual journey for which I am excited to see where He leads, I'm learning to appreciate people and things in a different light, and I feel like I can finally breathe.

We've introduced two children into our home every other year since 2011. I forget that isn't 'norm', and our journey to parenthood and a family of six is definitely not cookie cutter. This is all I know. For a while after having twins, I lived in survival mode. I just wanted to get through each minute/hour/day. I couldn't look to the next meal or day without incredible anxiety and even resentment. Two babies is HARD WORK. It's cute and ideal, but friends, it isn't pretty. So there I lived.. survival. 

As I was gaining ground, we introduced Lilly Scott as a sibling and daughter. Mac and Paisley were 10 months old, and we were welcoming a 6 year old into our home. I was so scared of what I would do now. I could finally manage, and my world rocked again. Not with a baby, but a child who had a whole world of needs that I wasn't even aware of how to give.

The message at church the day after the decision was made to bring LS home floored me. It was everything I needed to hear. I wept with thanksgiving as I remembered I wasn't alone. I was (am) part of a mighty plan that is so, SO much bigger than me. He is alongside me, and I just have to be intentional about making room for Him. You see, that anxiety and worry I struggle with... it isn't from Him. It's actually from an enemy who wants to steal Christ's glory in all things. 

Fast forward to 2013. We are having another baby! Yes! No. Oh.NO! I was scared. We were loving our precious family, and God changed it. Jordan reminded me at our first ultrasound of God's promise that we aren't given more than we can handle. When I decided to stop believing Satan and start relying on that faith I had exercised with Jesus, I was okay again. Sure, it took time, but I'm merely a servant. It's not all about me.

Now, in 2015, I have been given such an extension of grace. It is a beautiful thing. I've lived in a 'survival mode' since Wells' birth. It's so easy to put Jesus in a box. I'll let him teach me about ______ and ________ but no way is this an open area. That's my truth. That's what I did, even without realizing it. Then it hit me that I don't want to live like that. He meant so much more for me. It's okay if I don't have everything accomplished, but I need to let go of that guilt. GRACE, my friends, grace. It's a beautiful, magnetic, miraculous thing. It is so easy to receive if we just call upon Him. 

This morning I'm home with a pink eye victim who is napping. I got to spend time in quiet and scripture with a cup of joe. I open last week's study and re-read about hard grace. Ann Voscamp writes: 

God is always good and I am always loved... the pain that is given, give thanks for it, and transform it into a joy that fulfills all emptiness... This (is) the hard eucharisteo. The hard discipline to lean into the ugly and whisper thanks to transfigure it into beauty. The hard discipline to give thanks for all things at all times because He is all good...

Amen. This is from her devotion book One Thousand Gifts, devotion 26. It is a beautiful piece straight to my heart over the recent years as change went faster than I could grasp. 

In my whirlwind, I have decided not to live on the brink. I have asked Jesus to save me from being overwhelmed, and He has. I.can.breathe. I have a renewed love for cooking, grocery shopping, cleaning, and organizing. I intentionally put all things aside to teach and cherish my four little bits. They teach me about love, kindness, and truth. He saw me here, today. He knew it all along even when I was spinning in the hamster wheel that I put myself inside. After sharing my heart on this day, let me pause to thank Him for all things. He is so good, so pure, and I want to know Him better every minute. 

Thank you for reading with me today. Please let me know how I may walk alongside you. 

as always,

ashley 

Edit 1: Let me also share that Wells turning one was also part of the reconditioning of my mindset. So if you're in the midst of baby/child/life chaos, please persevere and know there is a light in the end. I have people who reminded me that the hard stuff is a phase. If your days aren't the brightest, rest in knowing there is a bigger plan, and persevere. You aren't alone. :o)

Edit 2: I forgot something so exciting!! In 2015... something will happen. I don't know what, but my heart is being prepared for something. Maybe not even in 2015, but this excitement is coming from one who keeps His promises, always.